a christmas poem, by a jew

'Twas the Day B4 Christmas
And out in the 'burbs
The last minute shoppers
Got on Ginny's nerves.

Out in the Land of Target
The Discount ShitHole
STL's will get nothing,
But a sack full of Coal.

While Ginny restocked the hardlines
And ran here to there
She could not help but think
Is Santa confused this year?

Is he mad that I'm a SoyJoterian?
Can he not handle the news?
Or is he mad that my roomate,
And my best friend are JEWS!?!

Then Ginny realized
It is not that at all
Santa loves ALL hippsters
Dyed hair and all.

So maybe her present
Is not one that breaks
It does not fit in a box
That Quinn sells and makes.

It is a new road thats coming
A new Job or Boys?
That I can't tell you
But he will bring you joys.

So Ginny-relax
Skate it off and hold tight
So goodbye to Target,
And to all a good Night.

I did not write this, Jenny is the bestest ever.